Is it just me or does it smell like family in here?

27 Dec

Ahhh, the holidays. The lights, the sounds, the food. The family.

We all know that the holidays are really just a stage for our dysfunctions to mingle and blow up like a high-school chemistry experiment gone bad. Sometime it’s comical and sometimes it’s too much, but it’s always there. Lately I’ve noticed that with age has come a sliver of perspective, and I learn about my own dysfunctions just by seeing them play out in others. So maybe that’s what the holidays are really about. A chance for us to learn a little, grow a little, and hopefully still love the whole gang when it’s over.

So what have I learned this holiday season? Where to begin…

It’s ok to say NO — No, I don’t want to go to church. No, you can’t take my baby to church without me. I don’t know if I didn’t get much push-back because they were in the “walking on eggshells mode,” fearing how I would react, or if it just really worked. I felt better regardless.

Even when you don’t get exactly what you want, it’s better to at least ask — I put it out there. It didn’t work. I was still bothered, but not at myself. Usually I would have been more upset with myself than anyone else. I won’t be doing that anymore if I can help it…

Sometimes you just need a break — I’ve managed to take a walk every day. Even if it’s just a short jaunt around the neighborhood, it’s been great to get out of the house and away from who or whatever is overwhelming me. You need a break, danygrl, so stand up and take it!

Not every decision is life and death — Whoa there horsey… there really are very few decisions in this life that should require the amount of stress we create over unimportant matters. And there’s enough drama in life already, so why make more? Better to save your energy for the big issues and the things we love in life.

Create your happiness today and live it— It’s never too late. Do it. Why wait? You don’t want to wake up in fifty years after fulfilling a long list of perceived obligations and responsibilities and then say, “Whew, ok, now I’m ready to do what makes me happy.” Life really is too damn short.

There may have been some others, but these are enough for me to work on right now. So to my family, I guess I should say, “Thank you for your splendid display of dysfunction this holiday season. I still love you!”

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